Reviewing the Millennium by Carol Wain
Online - 23 July 2020
Reviewing the MiIlennium
In 1965 I married a young man
who became angry, unreasonable and sad.
Thirty plus years on with the same partner,
Much time has passed.
I have since emerged
from my shell: I got a job,
got a life, did interesting things,
made new friends, had some fun.
Slowly the children grew.
Schoolboy troubles became adult conflicts.
Son came unstuck, drank, could not cope.
We had to pick up the pieces.
The angry old crab with worn out shell,
is capable still of unreasoned cruelty.
Now I have my own life,
interesting work, satisfying study -
And a whole new world in cyberspace,
linking up with friends abroad, elsewhere.
He meanwhile vegetated,
slowly losing mind,
eaten by anxiety,
dragging me with him,
sucking me into a bleak landscape
of despair, hopelessness, and early death ...
The alternative is over-sixties harmony:
A country cottage with roses round the door,
with blue-green mountains at the back,
country walks, pets, birds wheeling overhead.
Peace in later life – able to reflect,
write creatively on all life that surrounds …
if only these present troubles might end,
if he might find some calm, and the younger one
cease self-destructing, find new outlets.
This was hoped for but has yet still to come,
God holds out new hope to us both –
though not to my old man, who struggles on.
The Millennium has been and passed
No new leaves have yet been turned.
Our problems are the same.
So little did we know what still lay ahead.
By Carol Wain (March 5th 2000)
Fairly bleak review written in Milennium 2000, just 2 months before the event that would disrupt our life – the sudden death of my daughter in a road crash where she worked in Scotland. I took a sour view of my 35-year marriage that lasted until my husband's death in 2014. He developed dementia 5-6 years after Alice died. The Millennium was over-hyped.
Reviewing the Millennium